The subject of Women and their experiences online are starting to dominate the conversation in blog articles or discussions. Especially in majority male fields like Tech, there is a growing objection to sexism and other injustices.
When hearing about continued harassment or ignorance to women, especially Women who are my friends, I tend to get really pissed. There is absolutely no excuse in this dayand age to be told that you can’t do a job because you are female. Not only in meatspace, I hear this shit, but I continue to hear instances of sexism from my friends all the time.
I also tend to stumble into these events on my own along with the virol of racism as well. (Which is another topic for another day.) For example: Whenever I am bored I love to browse 4chan or Reddit. Despite their reputation for being horrible places to visit on the internet, I love watching a good train-wreck. Pretty much almost anything goes on 4chan, and to an extent on reddit depending on what subreddit you browse.
Conversations on those sites can be very provocative and brutally honest. Sometimes, things can get TOO honest when discussing certain topics. On both sites there is a strong under current of Misogyny. In many cases, the mostly anonymous posters have little empathy for Women’s feelings. Aided by a combination of sexual frustration of young white males and general resentment against so called “Normies”, there is a lot of pent up rage against women.
Everyone by now, knows about the intense harassment of Anita S , a feminist vlogger who started a Kickstarter campaign to raise money for her “Tropes vs. Video Games” series. The series of videos are an argument against the constant sexism in the gaming industry by highlighting the same overused tropes for women. When most games are using female characters as eye candy lacking in depth or not including them at all, Anita has every right to speak out on it.
Unfortunately an angry mob of mostly young white geek guys were VERY angry about this. They were so angry, that many of them harassed her or gave death threats. Even though Anita successfully reached her fundraising goal many times over, to this day the mere mention of her first name gets nerds angry on any gaming blog or forum.
If you happen to defend her like I am doing now, you will be called a “White Knight”, a whiny Liberal or worse. Sadly this is not the first time nor it will be the last time that outspoken women like her will be harassed by a mob of cowards.
Now the reason why I am writing about this is that I used to be one of those frustrated (but not as angry) males who seemed to blame the “evil feminists” for a lack of dating partners. I was so misguided, I nearly shelled out $2000 for a dating “bootcamp”. Luckily I was able to talk my self out of doing that and realized that issue was with me.
Thankfully I also never spent a dime on the numerous “PUA” books, seminars and other material that I illegally torrented. Sadly though I did manage to ruin a few friendships and alienated a lot of people from me trying to get laid. In the process I saw Women as a prize to be won and not as human beings.
In our popular culture, men are repeatedly drilled in their heads with the idea that you are nothing without a woman on your arm or your reward at the end of whatever journey/battle/fight is “the Girl”. Throughout most of my teenage years and twenties, I fully believed that shit. I had the constant belief that being in a relationship or having sex would validate me as a person, make me a man and put me in the category as a “normal” person.
I don’t have many regrets in my life, but I fully regret getting caught up in all of the hype and the major distraction of trying to get a girlfriend or trying to have causal sex when I could have focused more on school.
Hearing about the numerous things that nearly all women go through on a daily basis , I feel that I should try to make amends and point out all of the ways that even casual sexism can make things difficult for women.